A Tale of Two Sisters..

My mother is so glad to have Long Term Care insurance right now. She doesn’t need it at this moment, and hopefully she never will. So, why is she happy?

Well, I called Mom last Sunday, as I do every weekend. Every week she tells me of the news in her Sun City neighborhood. This person had a stroke, that person died, the other went into a nursing home, etc., etc.

Mom has been glad to have Long Term Care insurance for many years, as she has watched many neighbors enter long term care facilities or go to live with family. She does not want to be a burden on her children and she feels safe knowing that she will be taken care of by professionals, if she ever needs care. But these days she is more grateful than usual.

You see, my Mom has been helping the neighbors across the street from her - two sisters who have lived together most of their lives. The younger, a 97-year old, has been the only caregiver for her 101-year-old sister, who has Alzheimers. Can you imagine?

These two elderly ladies have no children and have depended on each other for everything. Now here’s the problem:

The eldest, I’ll call her Mary, became violent and also too frail to walk. She fell many times. Each time Mom would get a call to help pick her up (my mother is 75). The last fall was different from the previous falls. Mom couldn’t pick Mary up and her eyes looked glassy. They called the ambulance.

Mary was in the hospital for as long as the hopital was allowed to keep her. Her sister, who I’ll call Jane, did not feel strong enough to take care of her at home. Jane cannot walk far herself. What could be done?

No my mother had been after these two for years to get their financial matters in order. Mary said that she had a will made up, but she never told Jane where it was. The house was in Mary’s name only and Jane can’t even find the deed! Can you guess what is going to happen now?

Mary cannot recognize anyone. She is mending from broken bones in a nursing home at the price of about $4500 per month. The sisters combined money is only enough to keep Mary there for 2 months. One would think that everything will be okay, because the government will step in and pay for Mary’s long term care, since she is broke. That’s true, however…

What about Jane? The government will take Mary’s house, and because Jane is not a spouse, she will have to move. To where? Jane thought she could move in with her other sister, who was 93. It was all set up. Then she got a call from her younger sister’s next-door-neighbor telling Jane that her sister had just passed away.

Now, unless Mary dies within a couple of weeks and then Jane can find a copy of Mary’s will, Jane will be out on the street, penniless, as age 97.

Jane is beside herself. My mother takes her to see Mary every other day. Mary can no longer drive and she must be pushed in a wheelchair as she cannot walk for long.

So, what could these two sisters done differently?

Obviously, Long Term Care insurance would have saved the day for both of these ladies. It would have paid for Mary’s care and allowed for Jane to stay in the house until Mary passed, at least.

Mary could have made Jane co-owner of the house.

Mary could have made sure that the house was willed to Jane and that Jane knew where the will was, plus the name of the attorney who drew it up. This combined with the the previous two preventative measures could have saved them money and given Jane the security she deserves after caring for her sister for over 20 years.

Without coverage, at the very least Mary and Jane should have consulted an elder law attorney at the first signs of Mary’s symptoms and figured out exactly what to do to ensure both sisters’ safety and security.

They did none of those things, and now… Now it is too late. All Jane can do is to hope that she can find Mary’s will and then pray for Mary’s very speedy death.

Well, there is one other option…

Jane can bring Mary home and continue to try to take care of her there - again - and for God knows how long.

Do you feel grateful for your life today???